Face to Face>Facebook

Our church is taking the first two weeks of 2014 to look at the short letters of 2 and 3 John. Combined they are less than 30 verses and under 300 words in Greek. Yet they both conclude with big words that are important for us to hear.

Both letters close with similar words: 

“Though I have much to write to you, I would rather not use paper and ink. Instead I hope to come to you and talk face to face” (2 Jn 12 ESV).  

Now I am a product of the millennial generation so I do not write letters; I write emails, send texts and use Facebook instead. But the same principle applies: when it comes to our relationships with family and friends or in the church, words spoken face to face are more valuable than words written or typed.

I experienced this just recently. A good friend who lives well over 1,000 miles away came to visit us in our small farming town. He spent the weekend with us, ate meals with us, played with our kids and came to church with us. We had a great time and enjoyed a lot of face to face time. He then left and went on to visit another friend face to face (yes in another farming town even smaller than ours!). 

The point is that my friend placed a priority on the face to face aspect of relationships. Yes, I am friends with him on Facebook and we do send text messages to each other often, but nothing can replace the personal face to face time. The best way to “connect” is not ultimately on Facebook or by email or letters, but face to face. 

Since God left us in his inspired Word this emphasis on face to face time, how will that shape our lives?  How will we spend the bulk of our time in 2014? I’ll bring it a step further and apply it personally: how will my kids remember me? Will they remember a dad who always had his nose buried in the IPad? Or will they remember a dad who constantly looked them in the eye because he valued face to face time with them? 

I sincerely doubt that any of us will look back on our lives and remember much of what was on Facebook. But we will remember the face to face time we had with others, creating memories and enjoying great conversation.  Nothing can replace that.  Face to face time will always be greater than Facebook. 

My Favorite Book of 2013

As I reflect on all that I read in 2013, by far the most helpful book, other than the Bible of course, was D.A. Carson’s The Intolerance of Tolerance. It is such a timely word for us who live in a culture where tolerance has become the highest virtue and is prized above truth. 

In the book, Carson distinguishes between what he calls the old tolerance and the new tolerance. The old tolerance is what gave us the form of religious liberty in America. The old tolerance values objective truth and understands that there will be disagreements between individuals who are seeking the truth. Yet people can tolerate one another with whom they disagree. For example, while I will disagree with a Mormon neighbor over who Jesus Christ is, we can still live peacefully together as neighbors and practice our freedom of religion. We do not have to worry about killing each other over our belief system, yet we can still disagree strongly with each other under the old tolerance. In other words, rivals can tolerate each other. 

The new tolerance, which is the cultural norm today, is much different. To summarize what Carson says about it: the new tolerance argues that no one view is exclusively true; the new tolerance avoids serious engagement over difficult moral issues, and yet most importantly (and inconsistently) it holds that anyone who attempts to arrive at truth and moral conviction is labeled intolerant and will not be tolerated. So those who claim that they are “tolerant” end up being the most intolerant by their own actions. Those who cry for tolerance become very intolerant if one does not agree with their view of the new tolerance, which downplays all truth claims and puts all beliefs on equal playing field.  Carson demonstrates in the book that the new tolerance is largely secular since that is considered the “neutral” position. 

I’ll share two quotes from the book that encourage Christians to engage the new tolerance. 

“So part of our task, whether in scholarly output or casual speech, is to call into question this delusional supposition that ours is the best society because it is becoming the most tolerant society. The petty gain in open-mindedness that we have achieved in recent decades cannot compare with the staggering losses in clarity as to what tolerance is, in understanding the non-negotiability of truth, in the moral blindness that is rocking our world--a blindness we barely detect” (p. 167 italics mine). 

And in the final pages Carson sums up the Christian’s responsibility in this, 

“Evangelize. Evangelize and plant churches. Evangelize and pray. Evangelize and live life in the light of the consummated kingdom for which we wait. Evangelize” (p173).

I love those two quotes because they capture the nature of Carson’s writing (for the record, I have probably read more from D.A. Carson than any other author in the past decade of my life): he is a well thought philosopher, yet also applies truth very practically and clearly as a lover of God’s Word. 

And he helps us think through the Christian's response to the new tolerance. It is not retreat of fear, nor buying into it full-throttle, but challenging it with obedience to the very command of our Savior, “Go therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age” (Matt 28:19-20 ESV). 

Most Helpful Ministry Book of 2013: Liberating Ministry from the Success Syndrome

These final blog posts of 2013 I want to reflect on my reading this past year and share the most helpful books that have shaped my thinking. This post is specifically geared towards those in ministry. The next post will be about a book that I’ve found very helpful for all evangelical Christians.

I read several books on pastoral ministry this year, but by far the most helpful one was Liberating Ministry From the Success Syndrome by Kent and Barbra Hughes. The book was birthed from the their “failed” ministry experience. Decades ago, Kent planted a church that had all the elements of success on the outside. But attendance and zeal soon began to decline from the hundreds down to around 20. This left Kent in a state of depression and despair, even doubts of his call to ministry. 

God was gracious to Kent and Barbra during this time and “liberated” them from their misunderstanding of success. As Kent and Barbra began to study the Scripture about how God evaluates success, they found a different picture than the one they had bought into. 

The book emphasizes what success looks like from a biblical perspective: faithfulness, serving, loving, believing, prayer, holiness and a positive attitude. Sadly, this runs contrary to how churches and pastors are viewed. Success is usually seen in the numbers. 

I want to mention a few things about the book personally. First, I wish this was required at some point during my training for ministry. How many men enter ministry with the wrong model and aspiration of success? Statistically around half of the men who finish seminary will be out of the ministry within 5 years. Is this, in some way, tied to a wrong mentality of success? The attendance in our church has remained roughly the same over the past couple of years since I have been pastor.  We have gained some great families and also lost some. Certainly I could do things better as a leader. But without a biblical perspective of success, in a few more years I could feel like a great ministerial failure if the numbers do not increase. This book was helpful to evaluate true success. 

Second, I wanted to share my favorite part of the book. It is found on pages 102-103. Kent describes a conversation he had with a child of a retired pastor, who on the outside had all the elements of success, yet he was miserable. The son described his dad like this: 

“My father is retired now, but he’s just as resentful and unhappy as he has always been.....he literally married himself to the church, all the while disliking the people he served, and envious of his colleagues who had it ‘better’ than he.” 

Remember, this describes a man who throughout his life, on the outside, looked very successful as a minister. But listen to the next minister Kent described who had a genuine joy: 

“What a contrast with the pastor I met in a remote little western town. His church met in rented facilities and his car had seen better days, as had his trailer-house home. But as he walked down Main Street, stepping around the tumble weeds, he remarked, ‘I can’t believe how good God is to me. I have a wonderful wife, a church to serve, and sunshine 365 days a year!” 

The lesson: “success” from an outside perspective is not always better for the soul. True joy comes not as a result of the outward circumstances but from the Spirit working in the heart. 

After finding myself more “liberated” from the success syndrome, I find myself more echoing the second pastor. I too can’t believe how good God has been to me. I have an amazing wife who loves our church,  four fantastic children who are fun to be around, a church to serve with people who Christ died for, and sunshine probably 90% of the year!

So my suggestion is that all pastors should read this book at least once in their ministries. It is never to late to be liberated from the success syndrome. Thank you Kent and Barbra Hughes!

John Calvin on How to Read the Bible

 

My parents bought me the set of John Calvin’s Commentary on the Bible for a graduation present years ago. It is a gift that I value and use regularly in Bible study and sermon preparation. As I was preparing my message on Galatians this week, I appreciated what Calvin said about Gal 4:23 (which is where Paul uses the word allegory to interpret Isaac and Ishmael, you know one of the easier parts in Galatians!)

Here are Calvin’s words:

“Let us know, then, that the true meaning of Scripture is the natural and obvious meaning; and let us embrace and abide by it resolutely. Let us not only neglect as doubtful, but boldly set aside as deadly corruptions, those pretended expositions, which lead us away from the natural meaning.”

I found this really helpful advice for general Bible study and also for those who prepare messages for preaching and teaching. The gist of it is that our goal is to find the plain and literal meaning of a text, what Calvin refers to as the “natural and obvious meaning.”   In other words we are to try to discern, as best as possible, the author’s intent and avoid reading our own hidden meaning into the biblical text.   

Thinking about this brought me back to my early experiences of studying the Bible and also being in small group Bible studies. How often I hear it said “This verse means to me….” That approach is highly subjective and often gets far removed from the “natural and obvious meaning” that the Holy Spirit inspired.

So this is extremely helpful in how we approach the Bible as Christians in order to be faithful readers and obedient followers of God’s Holy Word. Instead of asking what it means to me, or trying to find some hidden meaning, we pray for God the Holy Spirit to speak the Word clearly, so we can embrace it and abide by it faithfully.

Happy Reformation Day 2013!

Today Protestant Christians celebrate what has been labeled as Reformation Day. A good summary of it can be found here. 

Currently, I am preaching through Galatians in my congregation, which was a book so instrumental in Martin Luther’s theology of the Reformation. To honor his work, I wanted to share a quote from him as he reflects on Galatians 3:27 and the phrase “have put on Christ” (the quote was found in his Second Lectures in Galatians):  

“To put on Christ is not a matter of imitation but of new birth and new creation. We have not just changed our clothes in the outward sense but become entirely new people”

I am thankful for how Christ-centered the Reformation was and how Luther encourages Christians to consider their new identity in Christ. God brought about something new in the year 1517 by his Spirit in the church. The same Spirit is at work today to bring about newness in Christ and reformation in our lives.

Happy Reformation Day 2013!

Pastor's Wife Appreciation Month

The month of October has been traditionally designated as Pastor Appreciation Month. This is a time when churches somehow thank their pastor for his service. It is a nice idea, and I appreciate the words of encouragement that come from my congregation. But I would gladly trade it for a Pastor’s Wife Appreciation Month.

I’ve heard that John D. Rockefeller once said that without his wife he would have been a poor man. The honest pastor will have similar words about his wife. Without her he would be a “poor man” in a pastoral sense or may not be a pastor at all.

Here are a few things that I realize about my wife, that without her I would be a “poor man” when it comes to ministry.

1. My wife helped me get through schooling so I could serve the church. She agreed to the Ph.T. program (putting husband through). In college she worked full-time so I could go to class full-time. In seminary she took care of our three children while I worked two jobs and chipped away at my M.Div. These degrees were for the purpose of serving the church in the future and my wife did all she could to help me get through. This does not even count in all of the financial sacrifice we had to make during those days, which she never complained about.  Pastors and churches should appreciate the sacrifice that many wives made in the days of preparation.

2. My wife helped me take my first call. My first full-time pastorate call was over 1,000 miles from our family and in a small town that can have some harsh winters.  My wife has always demonstrated the “go wherever” mentality when it comes to ministry. Without her support, I would never have made it to northwest Iowa to serve my first church. Pastors and churches should appreciate the sacrifice that many wives made to be serving in a certain locality.

3. My wife helps me to love the church. A wife will either be a help or hindrance in ministry. My wife is a great help. She has a positive outlook on the church even on the worse days. She eagerly serves where God has gifted her. She avoids bitterness when things are sour and does not repay evil for evil. These are all essential character traits. She demonstrates a love and commitment to our church.

The ministry is one of the few vocations where having a supportive wife is essential. If a plumber or investor has a wife who is not too crazy about his job, he can still get by and earn a living. This is not true in the pastorate. An unsupportive wife will kill the husband’s ministry and possibly the church.

The takeaway from this is for both pastors and churches. As pastors, we need to be sure our wives know how much we appreciate their sacrifice and love for the church. They need to know how essential their positive role is in our lives and how we deeply appreciate it.

Churches also need to realize how much of a sacrifice that the pastor’s wife makes. The wife has often agreed to go wherever her husband has been called to. The wife often has agreed with her husband to voluntarily take a low-paying job in the non-profit world for the rest of their lives to serve Christ. The wife stands by her husband during times of deep discouragement and often helps support his faith so he can persevere. The truth is, without the support of the wife, many churches would not have their pastor today.

So as I said earlier, I would gladly trade this month for a Pastor’s Wife Appreciation Month.  

Tornados and Teachable Moments

On Friday about a dozen tornados ripped through parts of Nebraska and Iowa close to us.  We were having our Friday family fun night—on Friday evening our family routine is to have homemade pizza, play games, and watch a movie as a family. Nothing, except for an extreme emergency, is supposed to interrupt our Friday family fun night. We agree to regularly fight to guard this time. So the Ipad and cell phones go into another room and we enjoy the relationships that God has given us as family. As it turns out, a tornado warning falls under the “extreme emergency” category and our evening got interrupted briefly this this past Friday.  

What stood out to me was the way my older children responded to the situation. At about 7:20pm the tornado sirens went off in our town.  The kids asked if it was real and we told them yes, we need to get to the basement fast. This was a warning which means that a tornado has touched down and is imminent.  

There was initial panic at first, but after things settled down (at this point I broke the Ipad rule and grabbed it to check the Doppler radar and updates from the Sheriff) my kids, led by my oldest son, suggested that we pray. What I found remarkable is that they knew, almost instinctively, that when there is a crisis, as a family we pray to God who is bigger than the crisis.  They were communicating that God is greater than the tornado. So here was a moment in real life where they were affirming the truth that God is sovereign and we can trust him in any and every circumstance.

Now I hope for my children that prayer becomes a very real and vital part of their lives as they mature. I hope prayer goes far beyond the moment of a crisis. Far too many people only look to God in a moment of crisis. When things are good, they go on living independent of him. I hope that this is not what we model in our family. We have tried as a family to model prayer both in times of crisis and during times of happiness so they get a balanced picture of what it looks like to pray daily.

But this was a good teachable moment for my kids and they did well. I encouraged them with that as we retuned back upstairs to finish our movie. But before the movie began, we gave God thanks for his protection and hearing our prayers. All glory to him. Tornados can be teachable moments.